Saturday Thoughts: On Being a Quitter

Being a quitter is actually a privilege that not everyone has the luxury (or safety) to embrace. I know many people view quitting in a professional context as a sign of a lack of determination and perseverance, and that quitters are often seen as unreliable. I used to think that way too. Growing up with very limited resources, quitting was never an option for me. But now, having the ability to choose differently feels empowering. I think, most importantly, quitting is the ultimate way for me to stand up for myself.

Back in school, I endured bullying from my 7th-grade classmates for my darker skin and appearance. Honestly, if I’d had the resources, I would have transferred to another school (🙄🙄). So if people want to judge me as a quitter in a negative way, they clearly haven’t experienced the kind of bullying that leaves scars—it's something that takes years to heal, and I'm still processing the *trauma* from staying.

Anyway, in the professional world, I spent years feeling dependent on my previous employers and caught up in office politics just to secure a stable income. I often struggled to assert myself, unable to say, “No, I can’t take that on. It’s not that I can’t do it, but you’re asking too much for the compensation I receive.” When I finally found the courage to speak up, it felt liberating.

When it comes to determination and perseverance, I used to believe that those born into privilege had the freedom to quit and start anew, to spend money without the same mindfulness that the rest of us must have. I can also see that people tend to 'respect' those who hold a bargaining position, especially when they sense that person won’t easily agree to demands. In other words, people who can just say "no".

But life is rarely straightforward, especially financially. I once experienced the *profound* satisfaction of standing up for myself—not just once or twice, but three times. But maybe there’s truth in the idea of “third time’s a charm,” because after that, I hit a wall sodara-sodaraaa. 

So after taking a two-year career break (from early 2023 to late 2024) following three job quits in two years (from late 2021 to early 2023), I returned to permanent employment with 'flexible' hours. While I can work up to 6-7 days a week and take a few hours off on weekends, the reality is that I often find myself still tackling to-do lists. Limited resources provided by the employer make it highly challenging to accomplish everything within a typical five-day workweek. 

Don't get me wrong, though. I do enjoy several aspects of the job, like interviewing people and getting first access to exhibitions, but there are definitely unhealthy elements too. 

This time, quitting is not a simple option. The country’s policies and macroeconomic conditions impact us more than I ever imagined. These changes not only affect how I manage my income but also bring the terrifying prospect of income scarcity, making it difficult to maintain a stable, decent living. The horror is here, in the room, and sits with me. So while being a quitter feels like a privilege I could pick right now, the potential fallout is *genuinely* frightening.